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Stephen Harper: Gift to the Apocalypse

April 30, 2010

Stephen Harper, the weasel who presides over our new Canadian theocracy, has declared that Canada really, really wants to help save the lives of millions of women and children across the world- as long as it doesn’t include funding for anything that might divide us. Thanks to public outrage, the maternal health plan we are proposing to the G8 now includes birth control, but under no circumstances (not danger to life of mother, incest, rape, starvation) will we fund abortions.

Because apparently, we are all united in support of the right of women to use sticks, bleach, and cattle-shit tea to end their unwanted pregnancies. It would be a shame to rattle this consensus that women in developing countries do not deserve the same sterile hospital conditions and trained medical staff that we have here in Canada.

I bet Canadian-funded Christian missionary organizations are dancing up and down the aisles. I mean, more than usual. Most mainstream NGOs that work on reproductive health issues probably include abortion in their family planning services, so now they can be easily eliminated from our list. Our tax dollars can then be diverted to religious groups, providing another platform to promote our prime minister’s Big Magic Daddy in the Sky.

I’m going to go ahead and award an extra point for the Apocalypse here. Harsh? Check out these numbers:

  • Unsafe abortions per year: 19 million
  • Percentage of abortions worldwide that are unsafe: 48
  • Percentage of abortions in Africa and Latin America that are unsafe: 95
  • Percentage of maternal deaths caused by unsafe abortions: 13
  • Deaths caused by unsafe abortions per year: 68,000
  • Injuries and permanent disabilities caused by unsafe abortions per year: Millions
  • Children who lose their mothers to unsafe abortion per year: 220,000

Apocalypse: 10.5

Humanity: 7

  1. Holy crap, those are some sobering statistics. This just smacks of misogyny, racism and elitism. You might want to add on another couple points.

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